Exit, pursued by bear.

The Darwin Awards are awarded to dead people (most of the time, anyway) who did something so outlandishly stupid that resulted in them being takenout of the gene pool. Having loads of time on my hands and nothing better to do, I was browsing the website Darwin Awards. Here are a few of my favorites:

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A guy in Italy was in line for a stop light. Just before the stop light was a set of train tracks. The guy, (apparently a Dallas Cowboy fan on vacation since I see this happen a lot here), pulled up and ended up having to stop on the tracks. Meanwhile, a train is coming. The bars come down. What does idiot do? Gets out and runs, of course. Toward the train trying to get it to stop. It did. After he was hit. He didn't survive. Score: Train - 1, Idiot - 0.

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A man was out hunting in a field with some friends and his dog. The dog found a bone. The man tried to take away the bone, but dogs being dogs, this one didn't want to give it up. The man started swinging his rifle, muzzle first. He hit the ground the gun went off. Score Rifle - 1, Idiot - 0

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From the state of Georgia (U.S.) comes the story of a city dump inspector who spotted what appeared to be a bottle in the trash compactor. No, he didn't get crushed. He got out and proceeded to share his find with a fellow employee. Unfortunately, while he thought someone had actually thrown away a perfectly good bottle of wine, what they had actually thrown away was a perfectly good wine bottle filled with antifreeze. Trash - 2, Idiots - 0.

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And then there's the final story which inspired me to use the classic Shakespearean direction for the title. They found a naked man, mauled to pieces by a pair of bears in their zoo cage. There were lots of empty beer bottles nearby. And they found the guys clothes untouched by the bears. So apparently he had tried to what....? Was he was successful at it and the male bear got jealous...? Bears - 1, Idiot - 0.